I Am Mama, Hear Me Roar

Just moments before we left the hospital as a family of three. 

Can I level with y'all for a little bit?

Before Caroline's arrival, I was a tad (read: a lot) scared about bringing a third person into our home. Don't get me wrong, I was ecstatic to be having a baby and I could not wait to see her sweet face in person. But, for a first time mama undergoing a major surgery to have said baby, I was a wee bit concerned about the adjustment period once we got her home.

I'm here to tell you girls, it has been amazing.

Flat-out, without a doubt, hands-down amazing.

I really don't know why the heck I was so worried. Because once you see your babe's face, you just know - inherently know - that you were made for this. Granted, Stephen and I were very fortunate to have both of our moms come and help out for the days following the C-section. And I'll admit, we kind of drew the lucky straw in terms of content babies. (Caroline has been a pretty easy baby and for that I'm very, very thankful.)

But the transition from two to three has been, well, a non event. It feels like we've known her forever, even though it has only been four short weeks.

Have there been trying days? Sure. Especially those first days home when everyone is trying to figure each other out. Baby-raising is far from glamourous. It's clumsy and humbling, and - yes, I'll admit this - occasionally involves muttering a few colorful words under one's breath.

But here's the thing that no one tells you, future mommas. No matter what situation you're dealt with, no matter how "easy" or "difficult" the baby, regardless of if the baby comes out your tummy, your - ahem- nether regions or out the top of your head, YOU JUST DO IT.

I'm convinced that every female has an autopilot mode that is flipped on when/if she becomes a mom. It's a side of yourself you'll never see until you have a kiddo. And it's awesome and powerful and all-consuming.

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I was scared of breastfeeding, but committed to giving it my all, as long as she was able to take my milk. And we are doing it. 

I was hesitant to try babywearing for fear I'd drop her. And although it took practice and a few clumsy attempts, we are doing it.

I have a horribly weak stomach and was a little afraid changing diapers might be the end of me, (although that sounds ridiculous now.) And we are doing it.

I was afraid I wouldn't know how to console her when she cried. And, turns out, it's one of my favorite things about being a mom; I love having that mommy superpower of being able to soothe my child better than anyone.

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We women are so much more powerful than we think. I'm learning things about myself that I never knew. I'm digging deeper and, in raising this baby girl, she's teaching me a whole lot about myself.

If you're pregnant or hoping to be a mama yourself one day, fear not.

You got this.